The Farm

Dad, this post is just for you.  Will you please call me when you have read it and want to talk?

This year has been SO HARD.  Craig’s back pain has been unrelenting.  We have tried so many things - steroid injections, physical therapy (2 different physical therapists), chiropractor, exercise, 2 different doctors.  We’ve even tried alternative stuff, foot zoning and essential oils and things like that.  Nothing has really helped.  We have an appointment with the surgeon next month and it’s looking like he is going to have surgery. We have talked to the doctors about whether they feel Craig will ever be able to drive a tractor again. They say that at this point they can't say.

Which is one thing.

Building this barn has been another.  It has taken such a toll.  Right now we are at a standstill with the equipment installation.  The company that we contracted with turned out to be terrible and we are trying to get out of the contract, but they say we owe them more money and we say we don’t.  It’s been terrible.  We are trying to work things out with the help of Craig’s dad and brother and our attorney, but meantime the equipment is not being installed.  There are no other companies who want to get involved at this point.  It feels like there is no way forward and no way back with this barn.  I wish we could go back and build something small and simple, something that lots of people had experience building, instead of this giant expensive thing that nobody knows how to build.  

But we can’t do that.

So here we are.  There’s been other problems, things with the employees and our milk contract.  This winter was very harsh and we lost a lot of cows.  We bought heifers last year and the idea was that the barn would get done and we would fill it up with all our new cows, but right now our herd is smaller than it’s been in years, even with the replacement heifers.  That’s a problem.

All these problems have combined this past year to cause mental anguish.  It’s felt like a catastrophe.

Craig and I have decided to list the farm for sale.

I know that this is a shock.  We’ve been talking about it for a couple months now.  What if we could sell?  What if we could make enough money on it to pay all our debts and live in semi retirement?  What if we could have a different life?

The decision hasn’t come easy.  And we’re not completely set on it, even though we have contacted a realtor and as of yesterday, it is officially for sale.  What we hope is that four months from now, Craig will have had surgery and his back will be completely better.  The barn will FINALLY be finished and will work.  We will buy some more cows and they will be milking.  Things will work out with the milk contract.  Our employees will shape up.

This is what we hope.  We don’t want to leave.  This is our home.  We love it here.  There’s nowhere else we can envision ourselves.  

But we feel like if we list it for sale and see what happens, then it could just be an option.  If we want to go that direction.  We are asking a high enough price on it that I’m not sure it will sell, especially because we’re not very willing to come down much on the price.  There’s no sign in our yard and we aren’t making the news very public.  We haven’t told our employees or ward members.  We aren’t completely sure it’s going to happen and we don’t want to start dealing with all the questions yet.  

Dad, you have given us so much help and support.  We don’t want to cause any feelings on your part, like you wish you hadn’t helped us if we were just going to turn around and sell.  We just want you to be prepared if that is the direction we end up going.  We are so grateful to you and everything you and Rae have done.   

Will you and Rae please consider this and call me when you are ready to talk about it?

We love you.